Okay, I've been gone a while. I know.
Summer class is going well so far. Cultural Diversity in the Classroom. It's nice to debate and share with people who don't shoot you down as being wrong. I think I've lived with fucktard for too long.
I got The Sims 3. Loved it, but right now a little bored with it. Found some fun blogs with interesting story lines, got me a little more into the game. Playing a lot of WoW. Too much. Became a guild officer. My new sims blog: http://livingsim.blogger.com/ :)
I'm a candidate for bariatric surgery. Duh. But, more importantly, my government health insurance (not the free kind, but the federal kind I retired with that finally got worked out) will cover a newer procedure called a gastric sleeve. This makes the stomach shaped like a small banana, and doesn't move the small intestine up. This is both good and bad.
Goods: Less messing with internal organs. Less suture lines to fuck up. Less diarrhea. Less chances of leaking. Not as malabsorptive as other methods... means less scares if you don't take your meds for a day or two on accident. Laproscopic!
Bads: Not as malabsorptive as the popular Roux-en-Y. This means results are not AS fast, and possibly would still have to have the small intestine attached to the stomach in two years. It's a newer procedure and does not have as long of a track record for measuring success.
So far:
I have done my first weigh-in. According to the doctor's scale, 307. I'll take it.
Before pics taken by the nurse. Yuuuuuck.
I had a sleep study. Nothing significant was revealed to me thus far. But man, getting that glue outta hair is ridiculous.
I had a psych eval. She said I was good to go with some more education on nutrition. Changing my elective from sign language to Nutrition for Fall semester, just as a bonus.
I STOPPED DRINKING POP. That's right. My Mt. Dew IV has been disconnected. I now have one or two glasses of no-sugar iced tea with lemon per day, and more water. I need to up the water intake still. And slowly decrease caffeinated tea.
Still need to do:
Bariatric Basics class
Nutrition/diet support/meetings/classes
Schedule surgery date
Sample and decide on bariatric protein liquids, shakes, etc. and start buying them early so it's not a huge amount of money at once.
4 weeks before surgery date:
Labs
X-Rays
Upper GI
Abdominal ultrasound
EKG
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
up to speed, down with snuff
I'm totally tired of being fat. completely, utterly SICK of it. in fact, I've had nothing but digestion troubles for the past two weeks. so, literally sick.
I can't diet when someone else in the house buys whatever he wants, and it's such gloriously bad food that tastes so damn good. I do my part. I cook from scratch at least once a week now, ALWAYS on meatless mondays. last week was pizza with whole wheat crust good enough to fool the fool. this week was pasta al fresco with fresh, gorgeous tomatoes, and fresh, real mozzarella. I didn't have time to make whole wheat pasta, or I would have.
sadly, the fool said the pasta was too al dente for him. tough shit, I say. it was fucking good. I'm thinking about adding some spinach and a bit of leaf lettuce and taking out the noodles for lunch today, because that just sounds demishus.
saturday I received money from the government. they have finished processing my disability retirement, and sent me the catch-up payments. the car is being fixed one weekend at a time. the external damage will have to wait until fall semester's student loan. I can now pay for summer school, so one less thing for the fool to complain about.
yeah, that's some good news. now for some not-so-good. the first year of retirement, retirees receive 80% of the current base pay for their old job. every year after that, is only 40%. so yeah, ouch -- pay cut. talked that over with the fool, and it's likely that we will be fine money-wise for a bit.
part of the reason it's much less pay, is that I'm now paying for health insurance. you know, the blue cross/blue shield that I've had since before I got married... even though I was offered COBRA and couldn't afford it, so we got married instead... good news there, though, really. I can submit everything from the past 2 years to bcbs and see what I can get back.
other good news about having this health insurance FOR SURE... I'm having gastric bypass. as early as july. and my deductible is only $600. I know it's not an easy fix. I know it's going to be hard. It's going to be emotional. and the fool is worried that in four years, when I'm all hot-looking, I'm going to dump his sorry ass. I make no guarantees, but if he doesn't SUPPORT me while I'm going through this, that might come before four years. (the four years came from my cousin's experiences, since she's now going through divorce after she's lost 200 pounds.) he has to stop talking me into eating poorly, or he will make me sick. he needs to understand this is a LIFESTYLE change, and that eating and choosing foods will NEVER be the same again... and it is something that will benefit our family, not just me. but he has to be on board with me.
this fall is going to be tough, but I'm ready for a good challenge. 13 credit hours, five days a week at school. little monster is going to be in preschool, since he's finally gotten the potty training deal (for the most part, and I'm confident when he's around other kids that use the potty, he'll be perfect). which will then leave room for me to get a part time job for a bit of extra cash. I'm only willing to work 15 hours per week, and only at a store that could benefit me. like torrid, target, or michaels. just think, if I worked at torrid, I could totally get my underwear for cheap. plus, if I'm going to be losing a lot of weight, I'll need deals on good clothes! and I looooooove shopping at torrid!! even if it's just seasonal. :)
summer is approaching. the unheated pools need to warm up. I need to get more active, and the best place is in a pool! no, really, the pain clinic guy told me it's best at my weight to only do aquatic exercising.
today's BMI: 51.6
I can't diet when someone else in the house buys whatever he wants, and it's such gloriously bad food that tastes so damn good. I do my part. I cook from scratch at least once a week now, ALWAYS on meatless mondays. last week was pizza with whole wheat crust good enough to fool the fool. this week was pasta al fresco with fresh, gorgeous tomatoes, and fresh, real mozzarella. I didn't have time to make whole wheat pasta, or I would have.
sadly, the fool said the pasta was too al dente for him. tough shit, I say. it was fucking good. I'm thinking about adding some spinach and a bit of leaf lettuce and taking out the noodles for lunch today, because that just sounds demishus.
saturday I received money from the government. they have finished processing my disability retirement, and sent me the catch-up payments. the car is being fixed one weekend at a time. the external damage will have to wait until fall semester's student loan. I can now pay for summer school, so one less thing for the fool to complain about.
yeah, that's some good news. now for some not-so-good. the first year of retirement, retirees receive 80% of the current base pay for their old job. every year after that, is only 40%. so yeah, ouch -- pay cut. talked that over with the fool, and it's likely that we will be fine money-wise for a bit.
part of the reason it's much less pay, is that I'm now paying for health insurance. you know, the blue cross/blue shield that I've had since before I got married... even though I was offered COBRA and couldn't afford it, so we got married instead... good news there, though, really. I can submit everything from the past 2 years to bcbs and see what I can get back.
other good news about having this health insurance FOR SURE... I'm having gastric bypass. as early as july. and my deductible is only $600. I know it's not an easy fix. I know it's going to be hard. It's going to be emotional. and the fool is worried that in four years, when I'm all hot-looking, I'm going to dump his sorry ass. I make no guarantees, but if he doesn't SUPPORT me while I'm going through this, that might come before four years. (the four years came from my cousin's experiences, since she's now going through divorce after she's lost 200 pounds.) he has to stop talking me into eating poorly, or he will make me sick. he needs to understand this is a LIFESTYLE change, and that eating and choosing foods will NEVER be the same again... and it is something that will benefit our family, not just me. but he has to be on board with me.
this fall is going to be tough, but I'm ready for a good challenge. 13 credit hours, five days a week at school. little monster is going to be in preschool, since he's finally gotten the potty training deal (for the most part, and I'm confident when he's around other kids that use the potty, he'll be perfect). which will then leave room for me to get a part time job for a bit of extra cash. I'm only willing to work 15 hours per week, and only at a store that could benefit me. like torrid, target, or michaels. just think, if I worked at torrid, I could totally get my underwear for cheap. plus, if I'm going to be losing a lot of weight, I'll need deals on good clothes! and I looooooove shopping at torrid!! even if it's just seasonal. :)
summer is approaching. the unheated pools need to warm up. I need to get more active, and the best place is in a pool! no, really, the pain clinic guy told me it's best at my weight to only do aquatic exercising.
today's BMI: 51.6
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
things I thought I already knew, but learned this week
1. I'm not pregnant, so long as that pee stick wasn't defective.
2. I stress out, and feel the need to pee on sticks about two or three times a year.
3. I shudder at the fact that I might end up with loudmouth in more classes next school year. whiskey tango foxtrot, why did she go and change her major to mine?
4. little boys who play hard, crash hard.
5. there is nothing quite as precious as the love of a child.
6. pets make people happier persons.
7. it would be nice to have enough money to clear up my credit and get a house.
8. I need a house with a yard.
9. what I really need, is a house with a yard and enough money for furnishing the damn place how I want.
10. so, in short, what I really need, is a house in a good school district with a yard, pool is not necessary but a plus (even if it's a community pool), and about $50,000 for interior design.
11. I wouldn't hire anyone to do interior design for me.
12. when a handsome little man asks you to "build a twack," you have to stop blogging and go play! stay young!
2. I stress out, and feel the need to pee on sticks about two or three times a year.
3. I shudder at the fact that I might end up with loudmouth in more classes next school year. whiskey tango foxtrot, why did she go and change her major to mine?
4. little boys who play hard, crash hard.
5. there is nothing quite as precious as the love of a child.
6. pets make people happier persons.
7. it would be nice to have enough money to clear up my credit and get a house.
8. I need a house with a yard.
9. what I really need, is a house with a yard and enough money for furnishing the damn place how I want.
10. so, in short, what I really need, is a house in a good school district with a yard, pool is not necessary but a plus (even if it's a community pool), and about $50,000 for interior design.
11. I wouldn't hire anyone to do interior design for me.
12. when a handsome little man asks you to "build a twack," you have to stop blogging and go play! stay young!
roam, calf, k?
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Mae West (1892 - 1980), Klondike Annie (1936 film)
Thursday, March 5, 2009
laughter
A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human beings
are the only animals that stutter,' she says.
A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered.'
The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become,
asked the girl to describe the incident.
'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the
Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew
it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!'
'That must've been scary,' said the teacher.
'It sure was,' said the little girl. 'My kitty raised her back, went
Sssss, Sssss, Sssss' and before she could say 'Shit!',
the Rottweiler ate her!'
The teacher had to leave the room.
are the only animals that stutter,' she says.
A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered.'
The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become,
asked the girl to describe the incident.
'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the
Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew
it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!'
'That must've been scary,' said the teacher.
'It sure was,' said the little girl. 'My kitty raised her back, went
Sssss, Sssss, Sssss' and before she could say 'Shit!',
the Rottweiler ate her!'
The teacher had to leave the room.
things I thought I already knew, but learned this week
1. weekends go by way too fast.
2. I'm horrible at playing the drums, even when they're fake and I'm addicted.
3. I'm usually sharp when I sing, but sometimes I'm just way fucking off.
4. it's possible to confirm #3 when playing rockband 2, boogie, or karaoke revolution party.
5. loudmouth smells horrific.
6. it's a smell I've noticed before; however, this time I've noticed that her teeth have tell-tale white fuzz. I know she works every day, but jesus fucking christ, you don't have to come to school smelling like you haven't showered or brushed your teeth in three damn days.
7. great, now I've got that kidd rock & sheryl crowe song stuck in my head. fucking karaoke.
8. when I get into a bitchfest, it really gets unbearable. seriously, I can't even fucking stand myself right now.
9. the gums in my mouth quickly grow over broken teeth. and that just fucking sucks cuz I can't get into the dentist until at least friday, which means it's going to HURT like a mother fucker when it's extracted.
10. no matter how many times I look at rocks, they will still never go much past, "oh, that's a pretty rock." obviously, geology lab and that damn long test have gotten to me. *twitch*
11. so I scheduled an MRI for my back. I wish it were possible to bitchslap a person through the phone. "you're having low-back pain?" yes. "can you lie on your back completely flat for an hour while you're in the mri?" I'll be crying but I'll do it....? wtf do you think? how the hell do people get an MRI done of their back if they have that much pain? it just takes longer.
12. this place doesn't have an open MRI, so next week on thursday you'll get to hear all about it. I don't know if I'm *that* claustrophobic!
13. I believe it's good for me to skip language classes, even if it's just so I can get away from loudmouth once in a while.
14. skipping a class means that I do all my lagging homework for the class.
15. this might be why I'm having trouble catching up in english.
16. I find myself oddly looking forward to tuesdays and thursdays. gee, I wonder why.
17. I have been fucked over by the government yet again.
18. apparently, although your earnings from actual *work* are only $6,000 in a year, if you get a bulk back payment of disability, and then a grand a month afterwards, you no longer qualify for a federal pell grant.
19. if my monthly check pays rent and cable, my credit card bill, and one other payment, which leaves me with 50 bucks to put into savings, and 25 bucks to waste on junk food, where the hell do my hubby's pay checks go? I need to learn this for next week.
20. my car sounds like shit.
21. this week is not nearly as funny as last week.
22. three-year-olds who are stubborn about potty training are not as uncommon as I once believed.
23. just because most of the kids in my dad's family were potty trained by the age of 2 does not mean it's the normal thing, and I need to stop worrying and just let my kid be stubborn about it.
24. if he's still stubborn by the age of 4, blame it on the sperm.
25. hubby's best friend's kid is 4 already.
26. she's not potty trained.
27. hubby's best friend's wife blames hubby's best friend's stubbornness.
28. I checked. they're really not related.
2. I'm horrible at playing the drums, even when they're fake and I'm addicted.
3. I'm usually sharp when I sing, but sometimes I'm just way fucking off.
4. it's possible to confirm #3 when playing rockband 2, boogie, or karaoke revolution party.
5. loudmouth smells horrific.
6. it's a smell I've noticed before; however, this time I've noticed that her teeth have tell-tale white fuzz. I know she works every day, but jesus fucking christ, you don't have to come to school smelling like you haven't showered or brushed your teeth in three damn days.
7. great, now I've got that kidd rock & sheryl crowe song stuck in my head. fucking karaoke.
8. when I get into a bitchfest, it really gets unbearable. seriously, I can't even fucking stand myself right now.
9. the gums in my mouth quickly grow over broken teeth. and that just fucking sucks cuz I can't get into the dentist until at least friday, which means it's going to HURT like a mother fucker when it's extracted.
10. no matter how many times I look at rocks, they will still never go much past, "oh, that's a pretty rock." obviously, geology lab and that damn long test have gotten to me. *twitch*
11. so I scheduled an MRI for my back. I wish it were possible to bitchslap a person through the phone. "you're having low-back pain?" yes. "can you lie on your back completely flat for an hour while you're in the mri?" I'll be crying but I'll do it....? wtf do you think? how the hell do people get an MRI done of their back if they have that much pain? it just takes longer.
12. this place doesn't have an open MRI, so next week on thursday you'll get to hear all about it. I don't know if I'm *that* claustrophobic!
13. I believe it's good for me to skip language classes, even if it's just so I can get away from loudmouth once in a while.
14. skipping a class means that I do all my lagging homework for the class.
15. this might be why I'm having trouble catching up in english.
16. I find myself oddly looking forward to tuesdays and thursdays. gee, I wonder why.
17. I have been fucked over by the government yet again.
18. apparently, although your earnings from actual *work* are only $6,000 in a year, if you get a bulk back payment of disability, and then a grand a month afterwards, you no longer qualify for a federal pell grant.
19. if my monthly check pays rent and cable, my credit card bill, and one other payment, which leaves me with 50 bucks to put into savings, and 25 bucks to waste on junk food, where the hell do my hubby's pay checks go? I need to learn this for next week.
20. my car sounds like shit.
21. this week is not nearly as funny as last week.
22. three-year-olds who are stubborn about potty training are not as uncommon as I once believed.
23. just because most of the kids in my dad's family were potty trained by the age of 2 does not mean it's the normal thing, and I need to stop worrying and just let my kid be stubborn about it.
24. if he's still stubborn by the age of 4, blame it on the sperm.
25. hubby's best friend's kid is 4 already.
26. she's not potty trained.
27. hubby's best friend's wife blames hubby's best friend's stubbornness.
28. I checked. they're really not related.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
mac of lark
it's wednesday. wacky wandom quote day.
"I want to put a ding in the universe"
~Steve Jobs
~Steve Jobs
and with Wall-E that might be possible.
thank you for giving him the ding...
and thank you for making sure bill gates didn't get to have all the fun.
thank you for giving him the ding...
and thank you for making sure bill gates didn't get to have all the fun.
gods, I want a mac.
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